Keeping your wits in the big city

THIS morning I survived an attempted con job, I think. Although, as you would expect, I didn't know I was dealing with a con artist at the time. It was a bright Sunday morning and I ventured out to perform some new-house-related errands. On the way, I stopped at a quaint French waffle cafe, Petite Abeille, on 18th Street and Sixth Avenue. Spring has just begun here in NYC. The sun was shining and a cool breeze was blowing, so I decided to enjoy my latte and baguette outside the cafe, beneath their blue and white striped awnings. No sooner than I had sat down, with warm beverage and hot crusty roll in hand, did a man walk past me. After passing me by, he did a double-take, and stopped to speak to me. First he complimented me on my looks, introduced himself as a television studio executive and asked me what I did for a living. "I'm a writer," I said. “Wow, you’re gorgeous,” he said, “Have you ever thought of using your voice for cartoons? Why don’t you come to my office and we can discuss it, it’s just down the street.” I looked at him. I looked at my baguette, and I asked him: “Do you have a card? I’m a naturally suspicious person. Perhaps I could see you later.” “Yeah, I have a card. But my office is right here down the street, why don’t you come up and we can talk about it?” Sensing my unwillingness, he pulled two cards out from his wallet and thrust them towards me. He held them together, with one sitting on top of the other. The top card was fully visible, bearing his name and a major network logo. The bottom card was almost completely obscured, except for the logo of another major network, peeking out from under the upper left corner of the top card. I reached for them. “Oh, I don’t like to give out my cards,” he said, withdrawing them. “Ok,” I said, and looked at him blankly, “I don’t think I am going to come with you right now.” “Well, uh, are you going to be here for long? I could catch you on my way back, if you’re still here.” “Sure,” I said, and he left. The minute he was gone I started to calculate just how fishy this whole scenario was. Now keep in mind, the whole thing only took about 30 seconds to play out. Within half a minute he was gone and my head was spinning. Words and images started flashing through my mind, just as they would in a movie or TV show. “I don’t like to give out my cards.” What TV exec doesn’t like to give out cards? Or for that matter, what human being who has cards (usually a box of 500 or so) doesn’t like to hand them out at the slightest whiff of an opportunity? And how could a TV exec work for two different networks? As I came to think of it, I realized: he was probably keeping the bottom card hidden because it had a different name on it. He had somehow acquired those cards from actual TV executives. No wonder he doesn’t like to hand them out - he’s only got one of each! But here’s the clincher: if I am so good-looking, as he said, why would I be perfect as a voice-over artist for cartoons!? It’s like saying you have a good head for radio. Suddenly I understood. Flattery was the key to any good abduction. As a con artist, the key is to make the target want to go with you. And had he been a little more convincing, he may have even had me. Scary thought, right?!